I think that term crept back into my life about 4-5 years ago…about a year after my late husband died. That was about the time I re-entered the dating pool.
With some trepidation, and a hint of excitement, I went out… with a few guys. I think it must have been one of the hardest things I’ve ever done in my life! Dating in your 20’s, without kids, was hard enough. Try dating in your 40’s with 3 young kids! Then there was that excitement with a tinge of guilt – guilty that you’re seeing other people after having been happily married almost 14 years. Guilty that you’re going out with guys that are not the father of your children…
Anyway, I must have kissed quite a few frogs before I met my prince. But that’s a story for another day.
Anyway, back to this “friends with benefits” thing… It didn’t quite work out with this particular guy. But I guess I must have made quite an impression on him because he refused to let go 🙄… When he finally accepted the fact that ‘we’ were not going to happen, he suggested that ‘we can still be friends’. And I thought, hey! Why not? I can make this friendship thing work. He was a nice enough guy. I just didn’t want to date him… I was about to agree when he completed his sentence ‘friends with benefits’… Whoa! needless to say, that friendship didn’t last.
What brought about this discussion? Over dinner recently, my friend told me that her teenage daughter has decided that she wasn’t going to date while still in High School. That she’s going to concentrate on getting good grades, that she doesn’t need the distraction that comes from being in a relationship. What a mature and sensible teenager. I was proud of her. Then her mom said, “she just wants to have friends with benefits!” Whoa!
So, since when do teenagers have friends with benefits? I thought only adults beyond their 20’s do stuff like that.
I guess the world is changing… and if 7-8 years olds don’t believe in Santa Claus any more these days and 5-6 year old girls think Barbies are too childish, then I should expect teenagers to want to have friends with benefits…